letting go Archives - Life Coaching by Christine Gipple

Change Your Closet, Change Your Life. A TEDx Talk to Share

I’m so excited to share this TEDx talk I found on YouTube: Change Your Closet, Change Your Life.

In the video below, Gillian Dunn talks about her own wake-up call when she went into her closet to get a candle that she was saving for a special occasion, only to find a big ball of blue wax inside the box. The candle had done exactly what it was supposed to do – melt – but it did it without her. This spurred an inner exploration that changed her life.

This video had me reflecting on how we live our lives in our own self-imposed chains.

These chains show up as limiting beliefs, excuses, fear, worry and doubt. These chains stop us from living the life we say we want. We find ourselves saying, “I’ll do it when…. ____.” and “Someday I’ll …____. Fill in your blank. We need to consciously shift our mindset and behaviors if we want to truly change.

Change is messy, and not always easy.

The next morning after watching the video, I leapt out of bed to start my day. During the elimination process, my 15-year-old daughter asked me why she’d never seen all these ‘fashionable’ things! She started trying them on, claiming them for her own. 😉 In the end, I donated two large bags to my favorite non-profit, and it was just the catapult I needed to re-fuel my desire to live with less.

Here’s what I want you to do: Take the next 15 minutes (and 37 seconds) to watch this Video, and then come back and answer this question:

What’s one thing you’re willing to commit to this week to allow yourself to step into the life you want to live?

Maybe you’re willing to….

Have that ‘hard’ conversation that’s been lurking over you.
Clear your closet of items that don’t fit (to make room for things that do).
Use your “good dishes” or wear your “nice clothes.”
Donate your excess belongings to someone in need.
Express your needs to someone in a loving, compassionate way.
Set a boundary with yourself around what you’ll no longer tolerate.

No more putting things off until “Someday.”

Life is far too short to leave our most cherished belongings tucked away in a box, or our dreams hidden in the back of our minds.

Looking for a great cause to donate to? Here’s a non-profit I LOVE: Katelyn started this non-profit when she was just 12 years old after being on the receiving end of an outpouring of support when her family needed it. Now, more than a decade later, The Angels Community Outreach supports thousands. They’re located in Pitman NJ, you can contact them here.

By Christine Gipple|2022-01-30T21:44:37-05:00January 30th, 2022|Uncategorized|2 Comments

Retrogrades, Relationships & Resetting Priorities

Are the retrogrades messing with your relationships? Do you feel like you and your partner might actually be on different planets?

Considering six, yes, SIX planets are in retrograde right now, it’s a good time to press pause on the panic button.

So what exactly is happening?

Right now, Mercury, Mars, Jupiter, Neptune, Saturn & Pluto are in retrograde. In a retrograde, things come up for review, processing, digesting and completing. It’s a time for tying up loose ends and details, and not necessarily a time to start a slew of new projects. You’re invited to complete those incompletions once and for all. When one planet is in retrograde, we can feel off, rushed, like things are more out of control than we’d like, but when six are in retrograde, it’s even more important to pause.

Even if you don’t believe in astrology, it may be hard for you to ignore some of the events that have been transpiring for the past few months. Things might feel more amped up or intensified than usual.

Personally, I’ve found it increasingly difficult to feel productive, clear, to stay on task with projects, or to have any type of communication with my partner that doesn’t end with us walking away frustrated and frazzled, and feeling unheard.

Here’s a little scoop on each of the planets and how they might be affecting you:

Mercury Retrograde – (6/26 to 8/19/18) Since Mercury is the ruler of communication, it’s definitely a great time to double check details. Have a spare key in your wallet, fill your gas tank, check your oil and fluids in your car, make sure you have a few bucks cash on you, etc. Just the other day, I walked out of the house without my keys, left the house with $1 in my wallet, and got to a show without tickets I already purchased, and it was “cash only” at the door. (Thankfully, I had a spare key in my wallet, and the girl at the desk knew and trusted me when I told her I purchased tickets, and she let me in.)
Mars Retrograde (6/26 to 8/27/18) When Mars is direct, we typically can communicate more clearly, take direct decisive action and more fully trust ourselves. But when in retrograde, we can doubt, not trust our instincts, and internalize emotions and events, feeling more pressure. Be gentle with yourself if you need more rest than usual, if you need more time to think about things and process what’s happening around you. Good self-care is critical right now. Here’s a little more on the Mars Retrograde.
Jupiter Retrograde – (3/9 to 7/10/18) Consider this to be the Yin/Yang for change. Change can be scary, especially when we don’t see it coming, yet, change is often the very thing we need to get us to our next level. Since everything is energy, and energy is always changing, it makes sense to surrender a bit and go with the flow. With Jupiter in intense Scorpio, you may experience your own upleveling so just observe what’s here for you, change what you can, and let go of what you cannot. There’s no rule that says change has to be painful.
Pluto Retrograde – (4/22 to 9/30/18) Pluto is all about looking at what needs to be healed, what’s lurking beneath what’s really going on, and what needs to be transformed. Pluto is the peeling back of our subconscious layers. Since retrogrades are a review of the past events, when Pluto is in retrograde, we’re invited to look at all those subconscious behaviors, shadow beliefs, choices, and patterns that are calling us to change. You may feel challenged beyond your comfort zone. That’s ok. It’s a time of review. So, Review, Re-Evaluate and if needed, Re-direct your energy and focus.
Saturn Retrograde – (4/18 to 9/6/18) As a Cappy (Capricorn), this is my ruling planet. Saturn is all about perseverance, tenacity and growth, and setting things right on the karmic path. What we put out is what we get back, so this lesson is amplified during a retrograde. We’re given the opportunity to really set things right if we’ve been off course.
Neptune Retrograde (6/19 to 9/26/18) Emotions may seem to be too intense for you right now. Neptune is one of the rulers of Pisces, a water sign that can be emotionally charged. During a retrograde, and especially if this happens to be your ruling planet or your rising sign, you may feel a bit more pressure to dive into the uncomfortable waters of the unknown. Trust. Stay with it. There’s growth here. If you feel the urge to run from this intensity, understand what’s here for you is an invitation to go a little deeper to resolve what’s been hidden. It’s also an excellent time to call on your creativity and intuition which may feel heightened. Trust your gut by going within and making the changes you need to make.

Action Challenge:

Two steps to prepare yourself physically and emotionally during the retrograde

Take 20 minute power naps to reset yourself as you need to. I can hear you saying, “But I don’t have 20 minutes….”, so I challenge you…Instead of surfing social media for 20 minutes, or eating when you’re not hungry, or starting a “conversation” with your partner when you’re already tired or spent, excuse yourself. Set your phone timer for 20 minutes and nap. I guarantee you’ll feel a new perspective when you re-engage. Just notice if you start to spiral, if you’re not breathing, or if you feel particularly uneasy with the changes happening around you. If so, nap, nap, nap. Every day. 20 minutes. And let me know what shifts you notice.
Take Action with any or all of these. Put an extra spare key in your wallet. Allow plenty of time for travel. Double and triple check details before clicking “send”. Have back up directions printed before going on the road to a new destination. Make sure you have at least $5 to $10 in your wallet of cash before leaving your house. Charge your phone or devices before leaving the house. Purchase a charger for your car and keep it there. Press the mental pause button before replying to a heated conversation. Let go of something you’ve been holding onto (a grudge, a personal belonging, an issue that’s causing you anguish, a belief that’s not serving).

Leave a comment below or email me telling me what you did, and what happened as a result. 🙂

Like this article, and want more like it? Follow me here.

Until next time, Press Pause on the panic button. Breathe. And trust. You’re right where you need to be.

x’s and o’s

Chris

Sharing is caring! If you know someone that would like to read this, please share it out.

Want to learn more about this particular retrograde cycle? You can do that here and here.

By Christine Gipple|2018-07-01T21:53:59-04:00July 1st, 2018|Uncategorized|0 Comments

Avoiding the spiral of mental chatter ♥

We did a street-long yard sale yesterday, and after the sale I noticed myself engaging in mental chatter about lost time. I spent time prepping for it, organizing it, physically being at the sale, then packing up the remainders for the various charities that will receive them. Then this morning, I woke with similar thoughts on how this sale took time away from other things that needed to happen, but thankfully, I shifted quickly.

Truth is, yes, it did take time, and, the items are gone, which was my goal. Our intentions were to make this our last sale, to have fun with family and neighbors, and to let my daughter have a lemonade stand with her friend. We released unneeded belongings, and created space for things and activities we do want!

So if my goals were met, why the constant inner banter about what I could’ve been doing instead of the sale? Because my to-do list is reallllly long and my mind chatter never stops. I desire order, ease, and simplicity. Letting go brings me these things, and it also takes work for me to get them. As much as I love to feel at ease, to have order, and for life to be simple, I need the structures in place to have those things. I also need good boundaries around my time.

How about you? Does your mental to-do list overwhelm you and stop you from achieving what you say you want to do? How do you move forward when mental chatter is in overdrive?

Here’s 3 things to do when mental chatter is spinning you into overwhelm.

#1 Start…Something. Pick one thing and just start. It doesn’t have to be perfect, and it mostly won’t be, but the act of movement will motivate you to keep going. This morning, I considered my mental list, wrote out all that I wanted to get done, then narrowed it down to what was most important, and what would feel most productive by simply being started. I slotted myself a specific amount of time and when that time was up, I stopped and moved on with my day. I’m putting time and attention to my priorities, which feels gratifying, energizing, and productive.

#2 Ask for help. I woke this morning mentally listing out all that needs to happen today, and the reality is my husband will be gone all afternoon, so it’s all on me. In order for me to accomplish everything we need to make our home happy today and this week, I need help. So I asked.

#3 Receive the help. This may sound silly and obvious, but sometimes we can ask for the help, then when it comes, we find we’re still doing all the work anyway. Give up the need for things to be perfect, and allow the support to be there for you. Example: My husband was grabbing some raised beds from Home Depot for me while I worked this morning. He texted me photos with questions, and I couldn’t decide which one was best, plus I needed netting and wasn’t sure which kind. I almost told him, “Never mind; I’ll run out later and get it.” I wasn’t trusting that what we’ll get is fine, and we’ll work with it. Instead I was thinking I needed to physically go there to pick it out. I quickly caught myself, and chose to receive the help, letting it be enough so I can move on with my priorities.

These three things can catapult you into action, and give you the space and ease you need to feel productive and less stressed.

Here’s the thing. We, particularly as women, are often the bus drivers in our home. We drive the bus. We’re responsible to maintain the bus with gas, oil, repairs, etc. We create the bus schedule, and we make sure all the riders get where they need to go, on time, and they have what they need upon arrival to their destination. That’s a lot to hold, and often we fall off our own schedule.

Today, when mental overwhelm takes over, try these three things of #1, starting one thing, #2, asking for help and #3, receiving the help. If you’re like me, your list is longer than you can do in a physical day, yet your Superwoman cape is probably pressed and ready to go! 🙂 Use this as an invitation to start something, drop the cape, and ask for (and receive) help. You’ll be surprised at what can happen.

A 4th bonus step is to find the gold in the event that has you spinning into overwhelm. My gold nugget from the yard sale yesterday was meeting a tow truck driver who offered to look at my 20 year old car that runs awesome, but needs an AC unit. After looking at it, he told me it looks like an easy fix, (where my mechanic told me it wasn’t worth fixing), it shouldn’t cost much, and he referred me to guy that’s local! Gold! ♥

How about you? What’s one thing you’re going to do this week after reading this? How are you going to use your spiral to inspire you, instead of sabotage you?

Tell me below or get in touch here.

Until next time, my friend, put a practice in place that allows you to push that overwhelm to the curb and just start what you don’t want to start.

x’s and o’s,

Chris

If you’re not on my list to receive resources on living a simpler life and want to be, please click here. If you’ve already joined, thanks so much for the support!

P.S. Sharing is Caring – if you know someone who would benefit from reading this, please share!

By Christine Gipple|2018-05-07T01:12:48-04:00May 6th, 2018|Uncategorized|0 Comments

Letting Go & Holding On

Why do we hold onto things?

What is it we hope to gain?

What are we so afraid of releasing, even if it’s things we’re not using?

It’s a loaded question, and one not easily answered because it’s subjective to each of us.

It’s subjective, and it’s also universal.

We all worry about needing things after we let go. We all can relate to feeling overwhelmed at the amount of responsibility on our plates, clutter in our homes and in our minds.

When it comes to letting go, we often resist. We think if we hold on, we retain a sense of control, because we know what it feels like to hold on. Letting go creates an unknown. It’s new territory.

Letting go means change.

Change is a form of surrender. We may not know what’s coming next. We may not know what to do after we release something, or someone. Where does it go? Where will it be used the most effectively? When can I get it there? Where does it go before I take it there or have it picked up? What happens after it’s gone? What’s next, and who am I without it?

All of these questions can lead to paralysis, so we do nothing. We hold on. We keep it “until we have more time” to figure out all the pieces before jumping in to something new.

I’ll tell you a secret. There’s never a perfect time. It’s like having kids. Or leaving a toxic job. Or starting a diet. Or leaving/starting a relationship. Or losing someone. There’s no perfect time. You can “prepare” yourself all you want, but when change comes, we still need to adjust, allow for transition.

There’s always that unknown space between when something ends and something new begins.

So what do you need to let go of today? Is it mind clutter that’s been overwhelming you into submission, where you just keep doing the same thing you’ve been doing and not liking the result? Maybe it’s physical clutter, and you just clean around it, seeing the piles around you (or not) and being energetically drained each time you pass them.

Action Challenge:

If it’s clutter you need to clear, give yourself one hour of time today. If an hour feels too long, make it 30 minutes. Set a timer for 15 minutes and pick one spot to clear, with the intention of bringing in more of what you love, need, and desire by releasing what you don’t. When the timer goes off, start putting things back so that when the ½ hour is up, your area is clear and you’re not left with chaos. Bag up what you’ve removed, label it “donation”, and put it in your car to go to a donation site. OR, put it in a bag or box, marked for the charity of your choice that you align with. Call the charity, schedule the pick-up, and seal the bag or box. Now you have a deadline for when it’s leaving.

If it’s not physical clutter, but an action step you need to take, allow yourself 30 minutes to research your options. Maybe you need to find a contractor or service and need referrals. Set your timer for 15 minutes making a list (an actual written list) listing out the criteria this contractor or service needs to provide. Do the test of passing up good for great. (Cheryl Richardson has a saying, “Pass up good for great.”). Once you have your list, spend the next 15 minutes asking for referrals. Maybe you can share a post on a Facebook Community Group asking for referrals. Be specific. Or text friends asking them who they’ve loved and used that moved them in the direction they wanted to go. When the timer goes off, thank yourself for taking a step toward creating space for you!

Resources to Receive Your Charitable Donations (aka Clutter):

www.purpleheartpickup.org –They’ll pick up from your home
https://angelsofgod.org/ – You drop off in Pitman, NJ
https://www.habitat.org/ – Pickup or Drop off. They accept larger household items.
https://smartparentadvice.com/how-to-donate-stuffed-animals/ – (This is an excellent article by Parenting Experts, Ryan and Cristin Howard. Their article offers ideas on how to donate stuffed animals, and their site is a great resource for navigating parenting as we release and let go.)

Leave a comment letting me know what worked or what didn’t.

Want to chat privately? Message me here.

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By Christine Gipple|2020-06-07T12:35:37-04:00April 29th, 2018|Uncategorized|3 Comments

If you’re home was alive, what would it tell you?

If your home could speak to you, what would it say? If your belongings could speak to you, what messages and words would you hear?

In Feng Shui, there are three main tenets:

Everything is alive
Everything has energy
Everything is always changing.

In keeping with this principle, ask yourself, what’s your stuff saying about you, and to you? Is what you’re keeping holding you hostage to old beliefs and patterns, or is it supporting you to take you to your next level.

In my last blog, I talked about ways to release clutter so it doesn’t come back. In this blog, I invite you to look at your home as an extension of you.

Your Home as an Extension of YOU…

Your home is simply an outer reflection of what’s going on inside you. Further, we’re always matched energetically with our homes. Meaning, on a vibrational level, we draw to us the very homes we need to grow and expand. Whether it’s the layout of the land, the numerology of the home, or the history of the previous tenants that align with our life circumstance, we’re always attracting what we’re energetically matched to or aligned with.

Consider this quote: “Our consciousness is reflected in our environment, and our environment reflects our consciousness.” In other words, what we believe inside, we create outside. And what we surround ourselves with outside, affects us internally.

What we keep matters.

Imagine that each item you own could talk to you, what would your belongings say? Would they want to be loved, respected, given a place to live? Would they want you toss them or pass them on to some other owner?

Challenge this week:

This week, when you walk into a room of your home, notice, does your energy go up? Or does it go down? When you pick up your belongings, what feelings come up inside you? Are you inspired, or are you drained? Become the observer of how you’re affected in each area of your home. Be discerning. If something drains you, let it go! Give yourself permission to pass it on. Yes, even that ceramic dog your Aunt Susie gave you that you put out every time she comes, even though you hate it.

Lastly, I need your help! There’s a lot of noise on the internet, and I want to be sure you’re finding this information helpful. If you liked this info, please hop over to Facebook page or email me here, to tell me what you liked, and what you’d like to see more of. Just hit reply to this email! I’d love to hear your comments and feedback! If you know someone this could help, please share it. 🙂

Next week, I’ll share what each floor of our home represents on the spiritual level.

Like this info? Follow my blog here.

A blog about living deliberately, aligned to what matters most.

By Christine Gipple|2018-01-15T12:33:30-05:00January 15th, 2018|Uncategorized|0 Comments

[Cut the Cord to your CLUTTER] in these EASY steps! (+ Keep it from returning!)

You might be fed up, ready to toss your excess stuff (clutter), because you know how good it will feel to get it OUT of your house. The instant gratification game is seductive. Yes, you’ll feel lighter from the releasing. AND, there’s an excellent chance the clutter will come back if you’re not intentional and deliberate when you’re letting go.

Before you start decluttering, ask yourself, “What is it I want to create space for?” Why is this important? Because knowing what you do want offers clarity and insight around what to let go of. Sometimes we learn the hard way. Sometimes we keep things we don’t love, or keep things that drain us. We may do it unconsciously, unaware that what we keep around us will hold the actual circumstances of our lives in place. I know someone who keeps Christmas ornaments and photos of all their ex’s, yet longs to be in a new relationship. Every Christmas they put those same ornaments on their tree, then wonder why they’re depressed, and not in a new relationship. They haven’t asked this question about what they do want. They don’t see the connection between what they keep, and how that locks in what shows up in their life.

I’m not saying letting go is simple. There’s nothing simple about emotional attachment.

I am saying if you can be discerning about what comes into your home or office, you’ll create a space and life that is in complete alignment with what matters most to you. Does that make sense?

Once you’re clear on what you’re creating space for, as you start the de-clutter process, ask yourself the following questions:

Do I love it?
Do I need it?
Do I use it?
Does it add value to my life? If so, how?
Does it reflect who I am now, or who I want to be?

If any of these answers aren’t absolute yes, why are you keeping it? You really want to be clear here. If it doesn’t say who you are or who you want to be, it’s going to keep you stuck in a past you don’t want to be in.

What’s next? Think about one area of your home, or one section of a room that’s most bothersome to you. What most needs your attention? A drawer, closet, garage, basement, junk drawer in the bedroom? Pick one small area. Choose the amount of time you want to spend de-cluttering. If you’re doing an hour, set your timer for 30 minutes and when the timer goes off, use the remaining 30 minutes to clean up what you started so you feel complete. There’s more to letting go, but this is one simple place to start.

After you do this, hop over to my Facebook page or email me to tell me what worked, or what didn’t.

Finally, my next few posts will be a continuation of this letting go process. Follow my blog to continue the journey of letting go, while living deliberately aligned to what matters most to you. You can Join my community here.

For the love of letting go,

Chris

♥

By Christine Gipple|2018-01-21T18:12:23-05:00January 11th, 2018|Uncategorized|0 Comments

Feelings & Needs, Part II – What’s driving your behavior?

How do you help someone when they’re out of touch with their own needs?

What if it’s your child, and they’re laying on the floor, with tears running down their face, and they’re so overwhelmed they can’t tell you what they need? Like it was for my daughter last weekend. How do you invite connection, intimacy and interaction?

As a parent to a highly sensitive child, it’s been a delicate dance of knowing when to ask questions, when to give space, and when to hold space. I know for me, when my daughter starts to get overwhelmed, I need to start looking at where I am. What am I feeling, what am I needing? How am I contributing to her own stress levels, if at all?

This where self-empathy comes in. In order to tune in to the needs of someone else, we have to do self-connection first.

When we’re meeting our own needs, we increase the capacity to hear others’ needs. I admit, it’s not always easy to pause, especially if we’re feeling stressed out, have too much on our plates, or are running on little sleep. Combine those factors with a highly sensitive person (HSP), and you have a recipe for disconnect and discord.

As I mentioned last week in Feelings and Needs, Part I, in our family dynamic, peaceful resolution to conflict is always the goal. Hearing the needs of everyone in the house is a priority. It’s our way of being. When I was growing up, the mindset of my parents was the kids were to be seen and not heard. We did what we were told, without invitation for conversation or discussion. Needs or Feelings weren’t considered, and I almost laugh when I think about what would’ve happened if I’d tried to express back then. I heard, “Do as I say, not as I do” more times than I can count. The silent message was, “Your needs don’t matter. Be quiet. Do what you’re told. Don’t ask questions, and if you have an opinion, keep it to yourself – you’re just a kid – I’M the parent.”

If you look at the logic of that, it doesn’t really make sense. When you think of a kid speaking their mind, what do you think of? I hear the saying, “Out of the mouths of babes…” – in other words, kids are uncensored, honest. They don’t filter what they say or how, and often they have incredible insight and wisdom. That’s a gift.

Consider this: When a need is met, it goes away.

When we can truly hear a person and connect to what’s going on for them, that’s often what they desire most – to be heard, to feel valued, to be seen. So when you consider the concept that all behavior is an attempt to fulfill a need, it makes sense to find the need under the behavior. Whether your child is curled up in a ball crying, or someone’s lashing out, screaming, or hurling things across the room, there’s a need underneath the behavior. Looking past the behavior to understand what’s driving it is key. That’s where the truth is. And where there’s truth, we can be vulnerable, connected, and move on.

However you’re celebrating this season, if you’re feeling obligated, stressed out, or like you can’t give anymore, press your own “Pause” button. Close your eyes. Take a breath. And ask yourself, “What do I most need?” If you can’t name the need, ask yourself, “What am I feeling?” And work your way to the need that’s driving your behavior. Find your way to your own truth.

The best gift you can give is your presence. You’ll feel happier, lighter, and so will the people around you.

Like this post and want to see more like it? Click here to follow my blog and receive my newsletter. 🙂

Much love and Merry Christmas,

Chris

xo

By Christine Gipple|2018-01-07T01:50:02-05:00December 25th, 2017|Uncategorized|0 Comments