Mastering Discernment: Navigating life’s choices with clarity and wisdom

It’s common for us to judge. As humans, we’re wired to want to make sense of situations, which involves making judgments. We judge ourselves, others, and the world at large. However, our judgments are often unconscious and can come across as blame, shame or attack. Our judgments can be swift and harsh when we’re not paying attention. 

Discernment, on the other hand, allows for conscious and careful consideration of a situation. Like the scales pictured above, discernment allows us to gather data, weigh our options, and make informed choices. For example, when we’re deciding what to say, what to do, what to keep, what to let go of, or even whether to stay in a relationship or not, we need discernment.

This article explores seven (7) ways to infuse discernment into your daily practices so you can live a more intentional life.

The 7 Steps

Here’s the short or TLDR version (Too Long Didn’t Read)

  1. Practice Pausing
  2. Elicit Self-Trust
  3. Cultivate Self-Awareness
  4. Learn through Reflection
  5. Embody Empathy
  6. Find Shared Values (Values = Needs = What Matters Most)
  7. Listen Actively + Express Honestly

Longer version ↓ for how to apply each step ♥

Step 1.  Practice Pausing

  • When you’re making a choice and it’s not an absolute yes, pause. If there’s doubt, it’s a NO in this moment. You might need more information, or just time to process the info you do have before choosing. Give yourself time to sit in the space of no longer and not yet. For example, when a situation changes, it’s no longer what it used to be, and it’s also not yet what it will become. This can feel messy.
  • Discernment requires space to ponder, especially when it comes to life’s bigger decisions like a job change, a move, choosing a college or leaving a marriage. Without discernment, you might make impulsive decisions that you regret. Pausing creates space for you to feel your emotions coming up around the choice. Pausing takes you off of autopilot and brings you back into your body. If you want to make choices that align with your values, pausing is an essential step to creating that clarity.
  • However, when pondering becomes rumination, it may be time to act. For me, if I’m ruminating, I’m starting to do overthink and obsess, which takes more energy and mental space than I want. Rumination tells me it’s time to trust, to decide, and to let the outcome be what it will.

Step 2. Elicit Self-Trust

  • Trust that whatever the outcome of your choice, you (and those impacted by your choice) can handle it. It may not be “perfect.” Perfection doesn’t exist. Maybe you’ll say something that you wish you could take back or you’ll do something that you later regret. That’s ok. Even in those choices, there will be growth. You’ll learn something that you didn’t know prior, and this allows you to evolve. You’ll gain wisdom, and the next time you’re making a similar choice, it’s likely you’ll choose slightly differently, if you’re paying attention. Which brings us to number three. Self-Awareness.

Step 3. Cultivate Self-Awareness

  • Without awareness, our judgements and assessments of others cause us to project onto others. We blame, don’t do our own internal work, and we may walk around on autopilot, making assumptions about why others did what they did, without having any facts to truly back it up.
  • Instead of judging ourselves and others unconsciously, make it a point to notice your judgments when they come up. This takes practice.
  • Each time you hear yourself making a judgment of yourself or someone else, you could pause and say to yourself, “This is me making a judgment. I’m telling myself ________”, and fill in the blank with whatever story or narrative that you believe in the moment. Challenge these thoughts by asking if this is true, or if it’s just the story you’ve been telling yourself. It may or may not be true. What data do you have that has you making this judgment? Is it an old story that you’ve been carrying around? Discernment allows us to carefully weigh data objectively without our own personal bias.
  • Unexamined judgments are unconscious biases formed when we were too young to know what was happening. Our job as consciously evolving adult humans is to do our inner work so we’re not projecting our inner wounds onto those around us.

Step 4. Learn through Reflection

  • To get to the place of wisdom, where “When you know better, you do better” (thank you Maya Angelou), you must reflect on what worked and what didn’t. Reflecting allows us to pivot when needed because we’ve assessed something objectively. To develop your own reflective practice, you could journal, meditate, keep notes on your phone, or talk into a recorder if journaling isn’t your thing. Whatever will support you in gaining clarity about what worked and what didn’t is what you’re looking for.
  • Therapy and coaching are also excellent tools to support inner work. Therapy is helpful to explore and manage emotions. Coaching takes it a step further and holds you accountable to the changes you say you want to make. It allows you to create an intentional destination vs. a habitual one.
  • Two questions to play with: 1) When things worked out the way you hoped, reflect and ask yourself, “In this situation, what went the way I wanted, and what choices did I make that supported that outcome?” 2) For things that didn’t work out the way you wanted, ask yourself the same question above, and then add, “In this situation, what choices did I make that, next time, I’ll do differently?” Allowing space for reflection invites more aligned choices in your future.

Step 5. Embody Empathy

  • Discernment goes hand in hand with empathy. Take time to consider the person or situation you’re judging. If you’re judging yourself, did you make the best choice you could with the information you had? Can you give yourself some grace? If you’re judging another, are you able to imagine what you might have done in their shoes? Or how they might be feeling about the situation? Examine how your own preconceived ideas or biases are contributing to your judgment. Embodying empathy allows for compassion and kindness. The kinder we are to ourselves, the better able we are to make self-honoring choices instead of self-sabotaging ones.

Step 6. Find Shared Values (Needs/What matters to you)

  • When you’re judging, look for places where your core values intersect with another. It’s in these intersections that we’re more inclined, and more willing, to collaborate with others. Finding shared values is deeply connected to empathy. You might find it challenging to recognize someone else’s needs or values if you aren’t able to empathize with them.
  • However, when we are able to uncover our similarities and connect to the motivation (their need) beneath another’s behavior, it’s easier to see the humanity of another, vs. the label that we’ve cast upon them.
  • Releasing the label releases the judgment, and allows us to make clearer decisions from a conscious, discerning place.

Step 7. Listen Actively + Express Honestly

  • Listening to others is nuanced. We all have our biases, so when we’re in judgment, it’s tough to truly hear another person. In fact, it’s close to impossible. If we can’t hear them, how can we make discerning choices that honor both of us? Active listening involves coming into a conversation clean, without an agenda to fix, heal, change or have the other person do anything differently.
  • Alongside listening is expressing ourselves honestly. To do this, it’s helpful to know what activates us, or what sets us off.  It’s even better when we’re aware where that comes from. Louise Hay used to say, “you can’t clean the house if you can’t see the dirt.” In other words, we can’t fix or change something if we refuse to look at it.
  • Hearing yourself is also an art. Sometimes, the voices inside our own heads are not our own. Old tapes played from family members, authority figures, or some other internal critical voice might override our own, drowning out our intuition.
  • Learning to listen to your own voice is critical to making discerning choices that align with your I’ve made many choices where I ignored my intuition, and each time, it’s been a massive growth opportunity, or AFGO (another fucking growth opportunity!). Just a few years ago I had back surgery. Walking into the hospital, I had an intuitive hit that told me not to have the surgery. I ignored my intuition to pause; I wasn’t an absolute yes. But I didn’t let myself pause and I had the surgery. And it’s been AFGO, which is a story for another time.

A final note about judgment. Judgment isn’t right or wrong, good, or bad. It just is. We’re human. We judge. It’s when we go through life judging without our own internal examination to see where our judgments are coming from that creates external havoc. We can’t change what we don’t want to see. (think of Louise Hay with the dirt). Being aware of our judgment is the best way to shift our judgment.

In conclusion, when you practice discernment in these areas, you deepen the connections with yourself and those around you. When you’re discerning in your choices, you’re living an intentional life. Living an intentional life enables you to set clear boundaries, do what you love, and have fewer regrets.

Here’s to operating from a place of internal alignment, where we’ll cultivate gratifying relationships that nourish us, which in turn allow us to serve others in a more impactful way.

A discerning life creates a more intentional life.

May 2024 be intentional and filled with all that matter to you!

Love,

Chris

Additional Resources:

Watch on YouTube:  Taylor Swift’s 2022 Commencement address to NYU graduates, where she discusses life choices and practicing discernment. 28m4s watch. It’s well worth watching!

Listen on YouTube: Alanis Morissette’s song, Tapes (about critical inner voices / self-judgment)

Read lyrics to Alanis’s Tapes.

Enjoy this article? Please share it with your friends and family. 🙂

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By |2024-01-04T19:22:59-05:00January 1st, 2024|Uncategorized|0 Comments
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Give yourself permission for Reciprocity

Give yourself permission for reciprocity. Make choices for your own self-preservation and self-care.

This time of year, reciprocity often takes a back seat. With so many people in need, it may seem selfish not to give – of our time, our money, our efforts, our service, etc.

Just for a moment, however, let’s put aside the needs of others, and turn the focus onto you.

I want you to think about what you long for in your day-to-day life. What’s missing in your relationships? Where are you settling for less than what you want, and less than what you know you deserve? Where are you hiding parts of yourself to be accepted, or loved, or just to keep the status quo?

In this moment, think about what “Reciprocity” means to you.

For context:

  • I’m talking about reciprocity in relationships in this post. Relationships that are physically and mentally capable of meeting you where you are, and who have no disabilities prohibiting them from being in a conscious and mindful partnership with you.
  • I’m not talking about reciprocity in terms of social responsibility or referring to people that are reliant on you, or who are literally incapable of offering mutuality in return

Here’s my definition of reciprocity:

  • Reciprocity means both parties choose to be in connection, for mutual benefit, and they agree to the “terms” of the relationship. They’re making a conscious choice to be there and to show up as equal contributors – whether that’s a friend, a partner, a parent, or your adult children. They will offer respect, trust, integrity and express themselves in the most authentic version of themselves that they can, while also embodying compassion and empathy – for themselves and the other.

This is what I give, and what I want in relationship. So, I have an expectation that I can be real, honest, and direct – even emotionally messy -and I’ll be received. Because that’s our agreement.

I’m no longer willing to accept relationships that are based on anything less than that.

On Marriage…

  • My husband and I are coming up on 30 years in March. And we’ve had a rocky road. Feels like 6 marriages within our 3-decade relationship because with each version of our marriage, we’ve come to a deeper level of understanding within ourselves and with each other.
  • In essence, as we up-leveled, the version of our relationship that we had up to that point was extinguished and we began again.

On friendship…

  • Another relationship that taught me true reciprocity is that of my very best friend on the planet, Lisa. Lisa and I have known each other since we were babies. Literally. Over the years, we had one clip of time where we weren’t in contact. I suppose we needed that space to do our own work to grow and heal and understand ourselves better. We needed to have our own life experiences so we could return stronger, more connected, and more aligned.
  • When we reunited, we mutually agreed that we could show up as we were. Even if that meant it was messy, or not all put together.
  • It meant raw, real, and completely uncensored. Brutally honest and authentic. But also, kind, compassionate and empathetic. Even if it wasn’t what we wanted to hear. We agreed to say what the other needed to hear.

My marriage and this friendship are what reciprocity means to me.  Sometimes one person may have something come up in their lives where they need a little more support. But it’s always balanced out with equal time being given to each other throughout the relationship.

I’m reminded of “Chosen Family.”

We can’t choose the family we’re born into. But we can choose the family that brings out the best in us, that supports us, and that allows us to be ourselves.

I found this instagram post this morning by elephantjournal that expands on this.

On Self-worth and burnout…

  • Reciprocity didn’t used to be so important to me. My worth used to be measured by how much I gave to others – at work, at home, with volunteering, and in my family and extended family – pretty much everywhere.
  • There’s a saying – “How we do one thing is how we do everything.” And I saw my pattern to run full steam ahead with my selfless acts in multiple areas. I took responsibility for situations that weren’t mine to begin with.
  • Then I burned out. I noticed certain relationships were tipping too far in one direction. I allowed my outdated core belief of “I don’t matter” to run the show. That belief had me take the backseat to my life, letting others get their needs met before me, often instead of me, and letting others take up space, which left me feeling isolated, empty, and resentful.

Reciprocity is NOT:

  • Over-giving and feeling resentment
  • Giving what we think we “should” (a word I’ve deleted from my vocabulary because “should” infers obligation, guilt and “have to” leaving us with zero choice)
  • Giving because it’s what’s always been done.

On boundaries…

  • I’m no longer willing to tolerate relationships that aren’t reciprocal. Where there’s only take and no give.
  • I’m no longer willing to be the only one to make the effort to repair any disconnect that may have happened, when in the end, the relationship was not reciprocal to begin with.

Marshall Rosenberg, the founder of nonviolent communication, talks about giving in the context of willingness in his poem, “The Hungry Duck.”  This poem basically says that we want to give from a place of willingness, like that of a child feeding a hungry duck. Because when we’re giving from any other place (obligation, have-to, resentment), we and others will pay a price.

So, circling back to the first questions I asked.

  • What’s missing in your relationship(s)?
  • Where are you allowing yourself to settle for less than what you want?
  • Where are you settling for less than you deserve?
  • Where are you hiding parts of yourself to be loved, accepted or to keep the status quo?

And I’ll add, what’s it going to take for you to put your own needs and self-care on your list?

Wishing you the courage and strength to no longer settle, no longer accept the unacceptable, and to bring yourself into alignment with your most authentic self that honors your needs, your boundaries and your own self-care.

With love,

Chris

By |2022-11-25T15:59:05-05:00November 25th, 2022|Uncategorized|0 Comments
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Fall into Connection – with YOURSELF! Two Upcoming Classes

Fall is my favorite season ever – I LOVE this time of year! Even though Fall is what has kept me in Jersey, Winter makes me want to leave. But, we’re not there just yet…

I took a few pictures of the fall foliage today, so I’m sharing here.  No filter. Just my phone.   I breathe easier just looking at these!

Fall invites us to slow down and pay attention to our inner nudges. It invites us to listen to those quiet whispers before they turn to screams.

If you have a self-reflection or self-connection practice, you know what I mean. When we slow down enough, we can actually hear what matters to us.

So, I thought I’d also share a couple intimate online events that I’ll be doing in the next few weeks – both of which foster deeper self-connection. ♥

  • The first event is happening THIS Friday, October 28th, (2022) from 1pm-3:30pm ET.  A small group of us (around 15-20 people max) will play connecting games to support us in saying what we mean. We’ll also show you how to get to the heart of what matters, and how to avoid circular conversations that can send us over our edge. You can learn more and register for the GROK party event here.

Past participants have found these parties extremely connecting and they keep coming back for more!

  • Which brings me to the second event – The “After GROK party”, taking place on Thursday, Nov 10th (2022) from 11am-12pm ET  Some of you have asked, “what comes next?” after attending the initial GROK party, and this is it!  You can learn more and register for the After Grok Party here.
  • The After Grok Party is likely to be a smaller, more intimate group.
  • (**Note**To attend the After Grok Party, please make sure you’ve either attended a GROK party before, or that you have a working knowledge of nonviolent communication before registering for the event.)
  • In both events, you’ll be supported in a safe environment to receive/give empathy and to experience connection and fun!
  • The Zoom link will be provided once you register.

You’ll want to have GROK cards available for our call. While not mandatory, having the physical cards creates more ease in following along. If you need cards and you’re local to me, please email me (I have some on hand). Otherwise, this link will connect you directly with Claire Schwartz who will get them shipped out to you!

Action Challenge:

Drop me a line and share what’s ONE thing you’re eager to let go of in 2022, and what’s ONE thing you’re excited to bring in for 2023?  These can be people, things, beliefs, habits, routines, etc. It’s YOUR choice. Sometimes the act of writing them down or sharing them with someone assists in making them happen, so do share!

 

 

 

By |2022-10-26T00:09:32-04:00October 25th, 2022|Uncategorized|0 Comments
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Change Your Closet, Change Your Life. A TEDx Talk to Share

I’m so excited to share this TEDx talk I found on YouTube:  Change Your Closet, Change Your Life. 

In the video below, Gillian Dunn talks about her own wake-up call when she went into her closet to get a candle that she was saving for a special occasion, only to find a big ball of blue wax inside the box.  The candle had done exactly what it was supposed to do – melt – but it did it without her.  This spurred an inner exploration that changed her life.

This video had me reflecting on how we live our lives in our own self-imposed chains. 

These chains show up as limiting beliefs, excuses, fear, worry and doubt.  These chains stop us from living the life we say we want.  We find ourselves saying, “I’ll do it when…. ____.” and “Someday I’ll …____.  Fill in your blank.  We need to consciously shift our mindset and behaviors if we want to truly change.

 

Change is messy, and not always easy.

The next morning after watching the video, I leapt out of bed to start my day. During the elimination process, my 15-year-old daughter asked me why she’d never seen all these ‘fashionable’ things! She started trying them on, claiming them for her own. 😉 In the end, I donated two large bags to my favorite non-profit, and it was just the catapult I needed to re-fuel my desire to live with less.

Here’s what I want you to do:  Take the next 15 minutes (and 37 seconds) to watch this Video, and then come back and answer this question: 

What’s one thing you’re willing to commit to this week to allow yourself to step into the life you want to live?

Maybe you’re willing to….

  • Have that ‘hard’ conversation that’s been lurking over you.
  • Clear your closet of items that don’t fit (to make room for things that do).
  • Use your “good dishes” or wear your “nice clothes.”
  • Donate your excess belongings to someone in need.
  • Express your needs to someone in a loving, compassionate way.
  • Set a boundary with yourself around what you’ll no longer tolerate.

No more putting things off until “Someday.”

Life is far too short to leave our most cherished belongings tucked away in a box, or our dreams hidden in the back of our minds.

Looking for a great cause to donate to?   Here’s a non-profit I LOVE:  Katelyn started this non-profit when she was just 12 years old after being on the receiving end of an outpouring of support when her family needed it.  Now, more than a decade later, The Angels Community Outreach supports thousands.   They’re located in Pitman NJ, you can contact them here.

 

By |2022-01-30T21:44:37-05:00January 30th, 2022|Uncategorized|2 Comments
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3 Tips to Keep Your Boundaries in Check

Setting Boundaries can be uncomfortable.  But not setting them can create havoc.

Hold onto your Boundaries because 2022 is Yang Tiger Water Energy!

My friend, Karen Alber Carrasco, wrote this great article and I had to share it!  It’s called, 2022 Tiger Wave: Surfing with the Yang Water Tiger. What struck me was the importance of keeping our boundaries in place, especially after the past two years of up-leveling our lives as we created, and re-created, ourselves to be in alignment with our values.

The past two years were ruled by the metal element, and metal represents details, the fine print, analysis of what is working, and what isn’t. Think of really getting inside the box and critiquing every detail.  That requires metal energy.

This year’s element is water. And with water, things can become dark and murky, confusing, or uncertain. Think about decisions you made when you weren’t clear, when your choices weren’t an absolute yes.  I imagine those particular choices might have brought about an unwanted result.  Yes?

That’s why being clear on our boundaries becomes critical.  The thing is, a lot of us may not even know what our boundaries are, let alone being able to hold them in place.

3 Tips to Keep Your Boundaries In Check:

  • First, Have a self-honoring practice or ritual in place – this is for you and only you.  Whether it’s meditating, writing, exercising, knitting, taking a hot bath once a week, etc. Find what connects you to you.
    • When you take the time to self-connect, your choices will be in alignment with what feels true and right for you, in each moment.
  • Second, before making a choice – any choice – check in with yourself and ask yourself these questions:  
    • What do I want? 
    • What do I need?  
    • How do I feel? 
    • What do I think? 
    • Because when we are coming from a place of knowing how we feel, and what we need, we are more likely to have our needs met, which allows us to make clear requests of someone else.   Its when we haven’t taken the time to figure out what we want and need that things get murky.
    • And this year’s Yang Tiger Water energy will be powerful and passionate, and has the potential to uproot us if we’re not firmly planted in our own boundary foundation.
  • Third, and this might be hard to hear, but I’m going to invite you to embrace being ‘selfish.’  I know selfish gets a bad wrap because of old programming of what not to be.  However, when we put everyone else’s needs before our own, we swing to the other side of the pendulum to self-less, and end up feeling obligated and resentful.  This reminds me of Marshall Rosenberg’s poem, The Hungry Duck, where the intention is strive to give from a place of willingness, vs. obligation.


As the first month of 2022 is almost behind us, and this new water energy is upon us, I encourage you to pay attention to your needs, your wants, your desires, and make sure you feet are planted firmly in your own personal boundaries.

Have a question or comment?   Reach out to me here.

You can find upcoming events here.  There are only a few spots left for the Feb 5th Grok Party, where we play games with Grok Cards to connect more deeply to our own emotions and needs.   And, registration for my group boundary coaching program will be opening soon.  🙂

Wishing you clarity and courage to choose YOU!

Love,
Chris

If you know of someone that would appreciate this newsletter, please share it with them. 🙂

By |2022-01-28T13:52:12-05:00January 28th, 2022|Uncategorized|0 Comments
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When you don’t recognize yourself, it’s time for a [RESET]

Today, I had a brief, but intense conversation with someone, after which I found myself blurring around a wooded path like Jason Bourne on amphetamines.   I’d crossed my own line, again.

After replaying the conversation in my head, I thought, “Who WAS that?”, and I was referring to myself.  I made a request that immediately left me with regret, and in retrospect I knew if the same was asked of me, if I’d had the same information this person had at the time of my request, I may have responded with confusion too.

If communication feels confusing (or infuriating!) during this Mercury retrograde, I’m right there with you.   Perhaps life feels like it’s unraveling, turning you upside down and you can’t seem to get a grip, or maybe you’ve left your house without your keys or something critical you needed, or you blew through a red light or turned the wrong way down a street you’re on every day.  During this retrograde, take the time to slow down, give yourself the gift of breathing.  Mercury is the planet that rules communication and when it’s retrograde, you can expect the unexpected.

I’ve made a whirlwind of choices and decisions this past month that left me second guessing, doubting myself, and not paying attention to my own needs, boundaries, and desires.   I’ve been in reaction mode, and ignoring my intuition, not making conscious choices.

Today was my final catapult back to me, and to trusting myself.   The retrograde is a time for reflection, and it brings up stuff to be healed.  I don’t need to be an astrologer to know when it’s in retrograde – my body and my emotional state reminds me, if I’m paying attention.  And I realized I haven’t been paying attention.

I’ve been spreading myself thin, running from one activity to another, not handling priorities that needed to be handled, and have been reactive to emotions that have been overflowing in me.  Though my sun sign is a Capricorn, my rising sign is Scorpio and, somehow, I know that’s adding some intensity to what’s already here.

When you notice you’re on auto-pilot, you’re showing up in ways you don’t even recognize, you’re hearing words escape your mouth that you immediately regret, be gentle with yourself.

The real “gifts” of a retrograde, any retrograde are to remind us to slow down.  So, give yourself a little extra compassion.   Know that you can reset.   You can always reset.

Every moment is another opportunity to connect within.

I’m going to take my own advice.

I’m pressing the big fat PAUSE button.

By |2018-12-15T19:38:00-05:00November 20th, 2018|Uncategorized|0 Comments
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[Stop Crossing Your Own Line!] Are you staying when you need to leave?

Are you staying in a job, relationship, or situation you should’ve left a long time ago?

Have you received intuitive hits, inner nudges, or had dreams about the situation, and ignored them?

I call it crossing my own line.

I can tell you what NOT to do.

Don’t stay when everything in you knows it’s not what you need, and not aligned with your values.

Don’t cross your own line.

That’s exactly what I did in 2015.  I stayed in a job that crossed my line in every way.  Employees talked behind people’s backs, bosses screamed at employees or other bosses, and there was no one I felt I could trust.  Yet, I stayed.  For the first time since having my daughter 8 years prior, I felt financial ease, and I liked it.

That financial ease came at a cost. In April 2015, I fell at work permanently changing my physical health.

I ignored my own voice.  I ignored those inner nudges.  I was so clouded that I didn’t even see the connection to my intuition until after the fall when I read an older journal entry.  In Feb 2015, I’d written about how I was “completely out of alignment with this job and company’s values”.  I didn’t listen.  Post fall, I was physically out of alignment with a back, knee and hip injury.

A couple shadow beliefs surfaced with this fall.  One was that, “I don’t matter”, and I really  needed to matter.  I told myself a story that if the bosses knew how badly I was hurt, they’d care; they’d make changes to insure no one else got hurt, or at the very least, they’d take precautions so that I wouldn’t get re-injured.  But the truth was, they did know and nothing changed.

Another shadow belief was, “I can’t depend on anyone else.”    I stayed out of fear. I feared I’d lose my financial freedom if I didn’t have the same income. It’s true my finances would change.  But I was living in a state of fear anyway.  Everything in my life was different.  I couldn’t do my job, yoga, exercise, climb steps, walk, sit for a period of time, or sleep without pain.  Nothing in my life was the same.  So how much freedom was I really going to lose?

Anger, righteousness and denial were all pieces of this puzzle that it took me the next two years to unravel and let go of.  If I’m being honest, I held onto these far longer than I want to admit.  Truth was, I chose to stay – even when this company showed me who they were, and I knew it was out of alignment with who I was.  I wasn’t making the changes I needed to make, so the universe stepped in to assist, taking me out at the knees.

This is what happens.  If we’re not listening, the messages get louder.  The whispers become screams.  The intuitive hits aren’t so subtle anymore.  We repeat patterns by drawing in those exact people, circumstances and situations that will have us play out the exact message we’re refusing to see.   Whether it’s a relationship, a job, a boundary issue with someone you love, (or someone you don’t), or disconnection from a partner we’re refusing to see.  Solutions come out sideways.   Often, the choices would’ve been far easier to just make the change in the first place.

Embrace the conflict.

What’s one core belief you’ve had that hasn’t served you?   I’m curious how willing you are to hold onto that belief?  Is it serving you?   Holding on can be a form of resistance, denial, or anger, or a combination of these things.  Do you know your threshold on when it’s time to leave?

Today I invite you to look at your life objectively.

Is there something you need to change?   Is there a nagging little voice inside that isn’t going away?

Sending you big love as you walk the path of alignment,

Chris

xo

P.S.  If you’d like to follow my blog and receive my newsletter on simplifying, letting go and creating more ease, you can do that here .  

By |2018-01-07T01:59:51-05:00November 26th, 2017|Uncategorized|0 Comments
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