Year in Review -13 Reflective Questions to set the tone for 2025

One of my family’s daily rituals is to check in by sharing our highs, lows, what we feel, what we need or want, and something we learned that day. This allows us to connect with each other, and brings awareness to what was most significant for us.

At the end of the year, we expand on that and reflect on what worked, what didn’t, what we want more of, less of, and what has to go in the coming year. This year, I added a few more prompts and I’m sharing those below.

The prompts are intended to invite deeper awareness so you can eliminate the things that drain you, and instead, focus on things you value most and what energizes you. You get to choose where you spend your precious time and energy. And only you can decide what stays and what goes.

On a call the other day, I was sharing this list of questions, and heard myself say that I wanted to think about what “gets my all” this year. Keep that in mind as you answer the questions about what gets your “all” this year.

There are 13 prompts to reflect on. I prefer handwriting my answers, but you can do whatever works for you. My daughter wrote her answers directly into her laptop when our family did this practice together on New Year’s Eve.

The practice:

  • Grab a journal and a pen. Make yourself a cup of tea, coffee, or whatever you prefer. Put on your favorite music and comfy clothes and settle in to spend some time with yourself.
  • If you want to invite others to do this with you, go for it!
  • My family and I do this silently together, (meaning we don’t talk while doing it) with music in the background. Once we’re all complete, we take one prompt at a time and share our answers aloud with each other. It’s voluntary and connecting. Often, when one of us shares, another has some kind of realization around something they haven’t thought of for themselves.
  • This practice invites deeper self-connection and reflection. It allows us to ponder where we’ve been, what we’ve accomplished, and allows us to touch on what we still long for. It also illuminates where we can be more conscious of how we’re using our precious time and energy as we move into the coming year. And within each moment.
  • Because all we really have is this moment.

The timing:

  • I like to do it until I feel complete, but if you prefer to use a timer, set it for 20-30 mins. If you want more time, just extend the timer. I enjoy flexibility so if I need more hot water and lemon, I get up to get it. Or if I must use the bathroom, I go. I also want space to explore what comes up in the moment without the pressure of time. So, for me, not using a timer allows me to stay more connected to my mind and body.

The prompts:

  1. What are your biggest celebrations this past year? What are you most excited about that you started, completed, or let go of?
  2. What’s your favorite memory from this past year? (can you connect to core values or needs it met?)
  3. What still feels unfinished, and what are you still craving?
  4. Where do you feel the weight of something you’re carrying — like anxiety, blame, the belief that you’re not good enough, obligations to others that you’ve outgrown, etc.?  Think about what keeps you up at night.
  5. Imagine you were ready to let the weight of what you’re carrying go. If you were ready, what’s the first thing you’d do?
  6. What is the biggest hurdle you overcame this year? Or put another way, What did you accomplish this year that you didn’t think you could? What parts of you did you need to access to achieve what you wanted? (tenacity, courage, intentionality, etc.).
  7. What’s the best decision you made this year?
  8. What’s the biggest lesson you learned?
  9. What happened that you didn’t expect?
  10. What was your biggest disappointment or mourning?
  11. What’s something you integrated into your daily life that has kept you sane for this past year?
  12. What’s your biggest gratitude?
  13. What’s something you’d like to “give your all” to in the coming year?

As we move into 2025, let’s take up space together. Let’s allow ourselves to dream, imagine, think bigger than we think we can achieve, and just do the things we think we can’t.

Courage is doing what I think I can’t.

When mind chatter stops you from taking action, or reminds you how you didn’t quite measure up, gently turn DOWN the voice of your inner critic. Instead, remember your answers to these prompts, and turn UP the voice of your wise inner self and follow the passions and desires that light you up.

Here’s to living our lives focused on what matters most – in 2025 and beyond.

Interested in exploring coaching or just getting connected, simply send an email here!

By |2025-02-18T13:09:06-05:00January 7th, 2025|Uncategorized|0 Comments

Feelings & Needs – Part I [PLUS: FREE RESOURCE]

What if I said it’s possible not only to get your needs met, but to also meet the needs and desires of those around you, without sacrificing your own values or desires?  Would you think it’s possible?  Would you want some insight as to how?

Here’s the thing.  We all want connection.  We all want to be heard, to feel valued, to know we matter, and be seen.  The essence of Non-violent communication (NVC) is peaceful resolution to conflict.  It’s understanding that we all have needs, and all human needs are universal.

FACT:  Every action we take, and every choice we make is an attempt to fulfill a need. 

Let me repeat that….. E V E R Y    A C T I O N we take, and every choice we make is an attempt to meet a need.

So wouldn’t it make sense that in order to get our needs met, it’s essential to first name what they are?  It sounds simple, but if you’re not accustomed to tuning in, to checking in with your body, with your emotions, with your own desires FIRST, it can feel impossible to name the actual need under your behavior or action.  The link I’m sharing has 3 FREE lists: feelings, needs, and body sensations.  It’s available for free download here Once you click on the link, you can choose which list you want to download, or download all three.  You can use these lists to help you connect to what’s going on inside you when you’re having difficulty naming the emotion or need.  If you’d like to take it a step further, check out this feelings and needs card deck.  When you click on the link, it’s the very first option shown.  Consider these new tools for your Life Toolbox.  (Disclaimer:  I’m not an affiliate for NVC. While I do teach, live and practice this way of living, I’m simply sharing this resource.  I was introduced to NVC more than a decade ago, and it was a game changer in the way our family interacted and how I approached life in general.)

WHEN we use the Feelings & Needs Card Deck:

  • When meltdowns feel imminent
  • If we miss the intuitive hits and meltdowns happen, these cards are a great way to connect from a place of love, of true desire to connect in a way that all needs are considered and valued.
  • As a way to connect to what’s going on inside you when you’re having difficulty naming the need
  • If one of us is feeling really off, tense, or irritable and unable to communicate.
  • Or if we desire deeper connection and want to enrich our experience with one another.

HOW we use the Feelings & Needs Card Deck:

We’ll simply lay out the cards, feelings first, and we’ll each pick our cards, in silence.  When we have all our cards, we then remove that deck, and lay the other cards, the needs.   We choose what’s most alive for us from this deck, again in silence, and then one person chooses to share first.  While one person is sharing, we listen with silent empathy.  We simply witness and listen to what’s being said.  Note:  This is just ONE way we use the cards, not “the only” way to use them.  😉  (Once, when I was overwhelmed with a lot of emotional attachment and charge, I used the cards to help me get clarity in writing someone a letter.)

If something is burning inside us and we’d like to respond, we ask permission.  We don’t shout out our thoughts or project our reactions when someone else is sharing.  We share with reflective listening.

Clarifying questions can be helpful to encourage someone to tune in deeper to what they need, but I encourage you to be clear of your intentions and agendas before asking questions.   This isn’t for us to fix, diagnose, or decide for anyone else.

Are you thinking, “this is too much work!”?

I’ll admit that in the moment, it does take more time, energy, patience, and willingness.   And…In the long run, it saves time, energy, patience and creates more willingness, because this practice of tuning in creates space for everyone to feel heard, which sometimes is all we need to be able to move forward in our day or life..

May you find peace, happiness, health and all of life’s blessings this holiday season.

With love,

Chris

P.S.  If you’d like to follow my blog and receive my newsletter on simplifying, letting go and creating more ease, you can do that here .

 

By |2018-01-07T01:57:48-05:00December 17th, 2017|Uncategorized|0 Comments

[Stop Crossing Your Own Line!] Are you staying when you need to leave?

Are you staying in a job, relationship, or situation you should’ve left a long time ago?

Have you received intuitive hits, inner nudges, or had dreams about the situation, and ignored them?

I call it crossing my own line.

I can tell you what NOT to do.

Don’t stay when everything in you knows it’s not what you need, and not aligned with your values.

Don’t cross your own line.

That’s exactly what I did in 2015.  I stayed in a job that crossed my line in every way.  Employees talked behind people’s backs, bosses screamed at employees or other bosses, and there was no one I felt I could trust.  Yet, I stayed.  For the first time since having my daughter 8 years prior, I felt financial ease, and I liked it.

That financial ease came at a cost. In April 2015, I fell at work permanently changing my physical health.

I ignored my own voice.  I ignored those inner nudges.  I was so clouded that I didn’t even see the connection to my intuition until after the fall when I read an older journal entry.  In Feb 2015, I’d written about how I was “completely out of alignment with this job and company’s values”.  I didn’t listen.  Post fall, I was physically out of alignment with a back, knee and hip injury.

A couple shadow beliefs surfaced with this fall.  One was that, “I don’t matter”, and I really  needed to matter.  I told myself a story that if the bosses knew how badly I was hurt, they’d care; they’d make changes to insure no one else got hurt, or at the very least, they’d take precautions so that I wouldn’t get re-injured.  But the truth was, they did know and nothing changed.

Another shadow belief was, “I can’t depend on anyone else.”    I stayed out of fear. I feared I’d lose my financial freedom if I didn’t have the same income. It’s true my finances would change.  But I was living in a state of fear anyway.  Everything in my life was different.  I couldn’t do my job, yoga, exercise, climb steps, walk, sit for a period of time, or sleep without pain.  Nothing in my life was the same.  So how much freedom was I really going to lose?

Anger, righteousness and denial were all pieces of this puzzle that it took me the next two years to unravel and let go of.  If I’m being honest, I held onto these far longer than I want to admit.  Truth was, I chose to stay – even when this company showed me who they were, and I knew it was out of alignment with who I was.  I wasn’t making the changes I needed to make, so the universe stepped in to assist, taking me out at the knees.

This is what happens.  If we’re not listening, the messages get louder.  The whispers become screams.  The intuitive hits aren’t so subtle anymore.  We repeat patterns by drawing in those exact people, circumstances and situations that will have us play out the exact message we’re refusing to see.   Whether it’s a relationship, a job, a boundary issue with someone you love, (or someone you don’t), or disconnection from a partner we’re refusing to see.  Solutions come out sideways.   Often, the choices would’ve been far easier to just make the change in the first place.

Embrace the conflict.

What’s one core belief you’ve had that hasn’t served you?   I’m curious how willing you are to hold onto that belief?  Is it serving you?   Holding on can be a form of resistance, denial, or anger, or a combination of these things.  Do you know your threshold on when it’s time to leave?

Today I invite you to look at your life objectively.

Is there something you need to change?   Is there a nagging little voice inside that isn’t going away?

Sending you big love as you walk the path of alignment,

Chris

xo

P.S.  If you’d like to follow my blog and receive my newsletter on simplifying, letting go and creating more ease, you can do that here .  

By |2018-01-07T01:59:51-05:00November 26th, 2017|Uncategorized|0 Comments
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