I wasn’t in the flow today.

I’m not sure what tipped me off first – the guy abruptly backing into my car while I waited at the stop sign,  or my windshield wiper flying off as I drove down the Black Horse Pike – in the rain.  But I was definitely NOT in the flow, and felt my day spiraling into chaos.

Maybe it was the meltdown that came before I left my house after getting an upsetting call, reminding me of the conflict I feel about a decision that must be made, soon.  Or being woken up by outrageously loud saws, music and voices coming from my next door neighbors roof as men installed fascia on his home.   Or when my vacuum cleaner spit OUT the items it was supposed to be taking in.  Maybe it was when the water spilled all over the paperwork I needed to take with me when I left the house.    Or the torrential rain and winds that took down a tree near my house, causing me to drive down a different street, placing me at that stop sign so the kind gentleman could smash into me in the first place.

Yeah, it was all of that.  One after another, things were happening, reminding me to stop.  To slow down.  To pause, and feel the emotions  flooding through me.

I knew it was time to get quiet.

But my intention was clear when I woke up.  We were driving to North Jersey to see the documentary, Vaxxed.   “My plan” was to get out of the house – despite the prediction of rain later in the day, despite my car needing to be dropped off for service, despite seeing unfinished signs to be made for a yard sale, despite dishes in my sink, despite my printer needing fixing so I can get it to scan, despite my home needing attention, and “me” needing attention.

I wanted to stick with “the plan”. 

But my daughter wasn’t embracing spending a chunk of the day in the car, which would’ve been the case.   Honoring her needs as well as mine is a core value to me.   So I amended the plan.  But I didn’t really want to.  I was all in my head thinking how important this film is, and how we can only make change if we all see the facts.  I’ve seen the film in NY but my daughter hasn’t.   My real resistance to cancelling our plans though had little to do with the actual film, and more to do with the mayhem I felt inside.  I needed order, and going with the plan allowed me to feel in control – of  something.

Here’s the truth.

Our “plan” really has no place in our day.  We can plan, sure.   And, we need to be aware, (for me, much more quickly), when our plans need amending.  It was one of those days – I wanted to do what I intended, and I didn’t feel like being flexible.

How many times have you had days like this?  Where things weren’t lining up the way you wanted, where you were resisting, and received constant blocks trying to redirect you?  What will you do next time this happens?

I know what I’ll do.  I’ll get on my yoga mat and meditate.  Or  write.  Or breathe.  Or cry.   Or all of those.

There’s a time to plow through and stick with the plan, and there’s a time to allow things to unfold naturally.  When those blocks come, it’s a reminder to slow down, to pause.

It’s not time to plow – it’s time to allow.

Because sometimes we need to allow stuff to move through us before it can leave us.

I’d love to hear what you do when this happens for you.   How do you reset yourself?  How do you tune back in?  I often will organize or clear clutter, but that just wasn’t in my energetic field today.   The universe had other plans.

Leave a comment below, and if this helped you, please share it!

With love and blessings,

Chris